Thought Shrapnel

I enjoyed reading this blog post from Simon Wolf, who, in his fifties, has decided to change his lifestyle and become fitter. He seems to have been prompted by thoughts about his own mortality, and discovering the YouTuber Ryan Condon who halved his weight from 190kg to 95kg by walking, running, and cycling.

Simon talks about three things: the gear required (get decent running shoes!), the technology he uses to track his exercise, but — perhaps most importantly — the mental side of things. That’s not just “getting out there” and having the motivation to do something, but getting over ourselves thinking that people are paying more attention to us than they actually are.

Having been active most of my life, it’s only very recently that I’ve struggled with this. My recent heart condition has meant that I’ve only this week run outside again for the first time in about three months. Of course, I’m running a lot slower than I used to, and virtually walking up hills, which made me a bit self-conscious.

But of course nobody cares. I’m just another middle-aged guy moving past people’s fleeting consciousness. Even if they do recognise me, at least I’m out there, trying.

As someone who is new to exercise and who is very self-aware about their lack of fitness and ability, just stepping out of my front door to go and do the first session was intimidating. What if people laugh at me? What if I can’t do any of it and give up after a few minutes? What if I can’t run at all? What happens if I see someone I know? The doubts go on and on. But I had picked a day, the 31st of March, and I was determined to stick to it. Worse case, I could pretend that I was out for a walk in some slightly unusual clothing for me.

So at around 6pm I walked up to the recreation field in the village where I live. The warm-up is a walk so this was fine. And the field was largely empty apart from a few young children playing and a joyous sight… someone doing some intermittent walking and running which was very possibly someone else doing Couch to 5K. Suddenly it all felt a bit more possible. But even without that I was remembering the words that “doing something is better than doing nothing” and I was indeed doing something and I felt empowered by it.

In the four sessions I have done since then I have had two where the field was essentially empty, one where some ladies walking their dogs asked me what I was doing (it’s incredibly hard to politely reply whilst still walking briskly), and one where the field was part-filled with a kids football club and, inevitably, their parents all watching. But I walked and ran regardless and nobody shouted anything at me and after a little while I zoned them all out and just got on with what I was doing. I survived and it didn’t put me off doing it all again. In fact, this week I was a bit sad that I’d done my run a little earlier and missed my, presumably appreciative, audience.

Source: Simon Wolf’s Blog

Image: Marcel Ardivan